Today has been a sad and weird day for politics in Britain, when the highest job in the land is reduced to a parody of televised and scripted satire we may have a real problem. Even more than usual our media and politcal class have become a laughing stock recently with the Labour party's internal attacks on and the newspapers biase against Jeremy Corbin and now with today's David Cameron story. Real, actual world changing events are going on in Europe and the Middle East and we're knee deep in this crap.
I still find it hard to believe a former member of the House Of Lords has accused the Prime Minister of putting his penis into a severed pig's head. Really....
This story is either true and therefore will be morally repugnant to the electorate - although, why I dont know, I dont care if Cameron could shit out statues of Madonna in his childhood, if his policies are bad for the country that's what really counts (obviously there are caveats to that) - and Cameron and possibly a lot of front bench Conservatives are going to vanish pretty soon for their past 'kinky, rich people indiscretions' and a snap election is on the cards. That's the only option if it's true - no fucking about here, if Cameron resigns over this and he is an actual reprobate in good standing then Osborne and Johnson will no doubt also be implicated by their association with the Bullingdon Club -rightly or wrongly - and who then leads the Conservatives - Theresa May, William Hague, I.D.S? :) See you at the voting booth!
Or it's entirely false and Hunter S. Thompson's first rule of politics is in full force;
"Call your opponent a pig fucker, make him deny it. Even if it's not true he'll always be know as the 'Pig fucker'"
But why?!?
What does Michael Ashcroft gain other than five minutes of reprieve and a brief chortle till his story falls apart under heavy scrutiny and his flimsy reputation lies in tatters? WHY ARE THERE ALWAYS PICTURES THAT ARE NEVER ACTUALLY PRODUCED? Why throw this much shit at someone who had previously lied about your nom-dom status for you. Why torpedo that ship with slanderous accusations? If you wanted a job in Government, you've fucked it up mate.
Cameron was clearly lying when he say's he didnt know about Ashcroft's tax status or he's a fool who's judgment cannot be trusted. That, makes him a shit Prime Minister not a pig's heads.
The head/head is not an actual issue any more than Corbyn not signing the National Anthem. It's been a lovely distraction that I've kinda enjoyed with hypocritical relish but let's be honest if all world peace and mankinds ascendency to greatness took was a couple of shots in a pig's mouth, who would take issue with that?
"Well, Mr Prime minister you have been working hard on the health service and education and nuclear disarmament and middle eastern relations all day. So here's a pig's head. I'll be outside"
It would be totally worth it!
But alas, this is David Cameron and now we are the country with a Prime Minister who has question marks over his beastiality past. That's a strong gimmick, if you can make it work. Cameron wont.
What is truly staggering in all of this however is we are entertaining the idea it is possibly true and are still only laughing about it.
Monday, 21 September 2015
Thursday, 24 April 2014
Some Weddings, a Gay Funeral and a Bitch
The more I consider it the more I am convinced that Andie MacDowell's character in Four Weddings & A Funeral is a dick.
She on more than one occasion sleeps with a guy who has blatant romantic feelings for her, continuously sods off, doesn't keep in touch and then marries some stiff she obviously doesn't love for wealth and security - having dragged her poor puppy dog eyed lover to look at wedding dresses with her that she looks stunning in, for her wedding to another dude - a dick move if ever there was one!
When that 'fairy tale' marriage ends in flames (surprise!!!) she then crashes Hugh's wedding day obviously knowing this will set his mind in a total spin meaning he leaves poor old crazy "Duck Face" at the altar.
All of that "I liked you saying it" crap about how Hugh loves her...that really makes my piss boil; if you liked it so much then don't be a dick and say it back.
She manages to make Hugh feel sexually inadequate and yet also complements him at the same time...truly the skills of a world class, gold medalist head-fucker.
And then....and then....sigh, there is the almost unforgivable cheap dig at Hugh in her wedding speech "Thanks but I'll keep you posted". Bang out of order.
Your boring Husband's speech killed the jolly, fat, waistcoat wearing, gay played by Simon Callow. Although his overacting was running a little thin at that point in the film and according to the the title of the movie someone had to die.
Carrie, you massive bitch!
The guy loved you and had floppy 90's hair.
FLOPPY 90's HAIR!
Christ, woman what more did you want?!?
Half of Scotland obviously.
She on more than one occasion sleeps with a guy who has blatant romantic feelings for her, continuously sods off, doesn't keep in touch and then marries some stiff she obviously doesn't love for wealth and security - having dragged her poor puppy dog eyed lover to look at wedding dresses with her that she looks stunning in, for her wedding to another dude - a dick move if ever there was one!
When that 'fairy tale' marriage ends in flames (surprise!!!) she then crashes Hugh's wedding day obviously knowing this will set his mind in a total spin meaning he leaves poor old crazy "Duck Face" at the altar.
All of that "I liked you saying it" crap about how Hugh loves her...that really makes my piss boil; if you liked it so much then don't be a dick and say it back.
She manages to make Hugh feel sexually inadequate and yet also complements him at the same time...truly the skills of a world class, gold medalist head-fucker.
And then....and then....sigh, there is the almost unforgivable cheap dig at Hugh in her wedding speech "Thanks but I'll keep you posted". Bang out of order.
Your boring Husband's speech killed the jolly, fat, waistcoat wearing, gay played by Simon Callow. Although his overacting was running a little thin at that point in the film and according to the the title of the movie someone had to die.
Carrie, you massive bitch!
The guy loved you and had floppy 90's hair.
FLOPPY 90's HAIR!
Christ, woman what more did you want?!?
Half of Scotland obviously.
Tuesday, 15 April 2014
Never cheer before you know who's winning: Nigel Evans and his epic hands.
This man is Nigel Evans.First some back ground...
He was the elected member of Parliament for his party for the Ribble Valley constituency; a safe seat for Mr Evans' party which was lucky for him as he has been unelelctable in four attempts from 1987 till 1992 in any other constituency before he was given the nomination to defeat the Lib Dems in the Ribble.
But that it not why my rant is being made. This is about hypocrisy, cronyism and lauding a douchebag.
Mr Evans has just been cleared of several charges of sexual harassment and one accusation of rape. The MP was initially accused by two junior party members of inappropriate behavior. In 2009 the then Chief Party Whip for the party informed one of the men who alleged he had woke up after a drunken night with Mr Evans to find the MP groping him that for Mr Evans to resign over the incident so close to a General Election "can't be done"
The Party did not officially act and Mr Evans was told to curb his drinking, watch his behavior and "say sorry" An MP had to be told this.
Another young Party worker was twice touched by Mr Evans inappropriately in 2003 at the Party conference in Blackpool at a public bar before Mr Evans was drunkenly "led away".
Another Man claims that Mr Evans was not invited to put his hand down the man's pants in a bar in Soho. But Mr Evans did so anyway.
A further man eventually just accused Nigel Evans of good, old fashioned rape at the MP's constituency home. Mr Evans denied this and said the man entered into a sexual encounter he later regretted.
The man regretted it so much that instead of just keeping it to himself he regretted it all the way to the police.
Now...I dunno about you. But whenever I regret having sex with someone I always notify the police.
The Party did not officially act and Mr Evans was told to curb his drinking, watch his behavior and "say sorry" An MP had to be told this.
Another young Party worker was twice touched by Mr Evans inappropriately in 2003 at the Party conference in Blackpool at a public bar before Mr Evans was drunkenly "led away".
Another Man claims that Mr Evans was not invited to put his hand down the man's pants in a bar in Soho. But Mr Evans did so anyway.
A further man eventually just accused Nigel Evans of good, old fashioned rape at the MP's constituency home. Mr Evans denied this and said the man entered into a sexual encounter he later regretted.
The man regretted it so much that instead of just keeping it to himself he regretted it all the way to the police.
Now...I dunno about you. But whenever I regret having sex with someone I always notify the police.
It's like the first thing I do after calling my priest.
Although what this man actually did first was approach a senior party figure Dr Sarah Wollaston. Whom like any good boss who hears such allegations approached her Boss who happens to be The Speaker Of The House Of Commons: John Bercow. Mr Bercow stated that as the incidents didnt happen on Parliament Grounds it was a matter for the police.
Our whistle blower Dr Wollasten is a former Police forensics specialist. That may be important in understanding her mindset in her approach and actions. But more on her later.
And so the alleged rape victim, who was later described by Mr Evans as "not a wilting flower" (er....he asked for it?) went to the police and made claims against Mr Evans. The claims were examined and were eventually considered in court to be the words of a man who had consented to sex and then hadn't liked getting bummed.
That is roughly the top and bottom of it. Joke intended.
The dude that fell asleep and woke up being touched, remember him and the Party Whip? He had been apologised to and had his original concerns quashed in 2009. But he was overheard talking about the incident in one of the bars in the House of Parliament. By....Dr Wollaston. And she was all like,
"Dude that all totally, like TOTALLY, sounds like a bad touch. You should like, grass on him, dude!"
And so he did. To the police. This guy gets flustered in court after getting reminded of calling Mr Evans an "all round good egg" with "commendable qualities" - not making a joke here - I wonder what this man meant by feeling "professionally uncomfortable" about making the initial complaint to the police? That I think is one of my problems with the case,
The were several people interviewed in connection with the allegations and their statements made up the bulk of the Crown Prosecutions' case against Mr Evans. Of the Seven used in the case 3 did not want to press charges and wished instead to make witness statements to an incident they were involved in involving a MP who had already had one accusation against him dropped because the party whip had deemed it so. At the time of the incidents these men were all junior party workers and most still at university. They now work either in Westminster or still within the reaches of the political class. And not many people see making unsubstantiated claims of sexual assault as a good career move in any kind of job but especially within the Machiavellian world of politics. And you do want to keep on working here? Don't you?
So the Maths is 3 of 7 did not want to press charges against Mr Evans.
Is over 1/2 of enough people enough of a half to take a man to court?
How many times do people have to say to you that you shouldnt touch their balls before the police have to speak to you?
When is enough rape enough rape to try a man? One or do we have to wait for a hat trick of accusations?
Other than the alleged rape and "sleepy hand job" the others are instances of a drunk gay man touching other drunk men in a public place (and a private place if ya getz me) when only one of those men thought it was a good idea.
This to most people is the smell, flavor, texture and colour of Sexual harassment. If a man did this to a woman in a bar and the woman had not invited or wanted the attention they would be an issue of some sort. I dont know what kind of issue as it varies. But a variable issue there would be.
But these kind of displays of ice breaking public affection in the Gay community may be considered more common and Mr Evans is out and has been applauded for being so and since 2003 has been a supporter of gay rights in the commons - his pre 2003 voting record on gay issues is a little lame. So he may be excused for being a little touch friendly in Soho on a Saturday night. He was it seems though quite overly friendly with young men in his charge at work when they socialised and alcohol was involved. So this begs the question is Mr Evans extraordinary attractive to young men who are interested but then change their minds and unfortunately decided to gang up on him and cry wolf several times or does Mr Evans get drunk and is unable to keep his hands to himself? Does Mr Evans think that putting himself in that situation anyway is acceptable behavior for a public servant?
Although what this man actually did first was approach a senior party figure Dr Sarah Wollaston. Whom like any good boss who hears such allegations approached her Boss who happens to be The Speaker Of The House Of Commons: John Bercow. Mr Bercow stated that as the incidents didnt happen on Parliament Grounds it was a matter for the police.
Our whistle blower Dr Wollasten is a former Police forensics specialist. That may be important in understanding her mindset in her approach and actions. But more on her later.
And so the alleged rape victim, who was later described by Mr Evans as "not a wilting flower" (er....he asked for it?) went to the police and made claims against Mr Evans. The claims were examined and were eventually considered in court to be the words of a man who had consented to sex and then hadn't liked getting bummed.
That is roughly the top and bottom of it. Joke intended.
The dude that fell asleep and woke up being touched, remember him and the Party Whip? He had been apologised to and had his original concerns quashed in 2009. But he was overheard talking about the incident in one of the bars in the House of Parliament. By....Dr Wollaston. And she was all like,
"Dude that all totally, like TOTALLY, sounds like a bad touch. You should like, grass on him, dude!"
And so he did. To the police. This guy gets flustered in court after getting reminded of calling Mr Evans an "all round good egg" with "commendable qualities" - not making a joke here - I wonder what this man meant by feeling "professionally uncomfortable" about making the initial complaint to the police? That I think is one of my problems with the case,
The were several people interviewed in connection with the allegations and their statements made up the bulk of the Crown Prosecutions' case against Mr Evans. Of the Seven used in the case 3 did not want to press charges and wished instead to make witness statements to an incident they were involved in involving a MP who had already had one accusation against him dropped because the party whip had deemed it so. At the time of the incidents these men were all junior party workers and most still at university. They now work either in Westminster or still within the reaches of the political class. And not many people see making unsubstantiated claims of sexual assault as a good career move in any kind of job but especially within the Machiavellian world of politics. And you do want to keep on working here? Don't you?
So the Maths is 3 of 7 did not want to press charges against Mr Evans.
Is over 1/2 of enough people enough of a half to take a man to court?
How many times do people have to say to you that you shouldnt touch their balls before the police have to speak to you?
When is enough rape enough rape to try a man? One or do we have to wait for a hat trick of accusations?
Other than the alleged rape and "sleepy hand job" the others are instances of a drunk gay man touching other drunk men in a public place (and a private place if ya getz me) when only one of those men thought it was a good idea.
This to most people is the smell, flavor, texture and colour of Sexual harassment. If a man did this to a woman in a bar and the woman had not invited or wanted the attention they would be an issue of some sort. I dont know what kind of issue as it varies. But a variable issue there would be.
But these kind of displays of ice breaking public affection in the Gay community may be considered more common and Mr Evans is out and has been applauded for being so and since 2003 has been a supporter of gay rights in the commons - his pre 2003 voting record on gay issues is a little lame. So he may be excused for being a little touch friendly in Soho on a Saturday night. He was it seems though quite overly friendly with young men in his charge at work when they socialised and alcohol was involved. So this begs the question is Mr Evans extraordinary attractive to young men who are interested but then change their minds and unfortunately decided to gang up on him and cry wolf several times or does Mr Evans get drunk and is unable to keep his hands to himself? Does Mr Evans think that putting himself in that situation anyway is acceptable behavior for a public servant?
Did these allegations get muffled by the several interviewed men due to them being leaned on by their superiors in parliament or by their own "professionally uncomfortableness" or is this just an simple instance of this being a normal occurrence in the gay community and the young gay lads should expect and accept a little friendly grope now and then from a drunk elder gay gentleman.
Man up. It's a right of passage. Don't be a spoil sport.
I would suggest that regardless of his or anyone elses sexuality that acting this way is lacking in touch of decorum and...DUDE YOU'RE AN MP!
All speculative of course. Who knows? Who really even cares?
People. people care. Dr Wollaston has been called upon by MPs in her party to publically apologise to Mr Evans for going to the Police. Why? She was approached by one junior worker about a serious offence and over heard another talk about a sexual harassment about the same dude. I would hope given the circumstances that anyone would seek advice on hearing such things. and she went to the highest political authority she could the Speaker. He instructed her to inform the police.
The CPS interviewed several people and found four wishing to press charges...They have been accused of being bullish in their pursuit to take Mr Evans to court.
So again.... Is over 1/2 of enough people enough of a half to take a man to court? How many times do people have to say to you that you shouldnt touch their balls before the police have to speak to you?
When is enough rape enough rape to try a man? One or do we have to wait for a hat trick of accusations?
Mr Evans has been cleared of all the charges. He has not at any point disputed he drinks a lot and then gets touchy in an inappropriate way.
So again.... Is over 1/2 of enough people enough of a half to take a man to court? How many times do people have to say to you that you shouldnt touch their balls before the police have to speak to you?
When is enough rape enough rape to try a man? One or do we have to wait for a hat trick of accusations?
Mr Evans has been cleared of all the charges. He has not at any point disputed he drinks a lot and then gets touchy in an inappropriate way.
Mr Evans has paid for his own defence and is our of pocket by £130,000 he has since complained that he wont be able to claim this back. He was the speaker in the debate where a cut was made to refunds on court costs. He now realises how government cuts affect real people.
I dont care if you're gay, straight, bi, poly, trans, a yeti, The Gruffalo or a imaginary rabbit. If you're gonna be an MP try and have some standards. If you're gonna be an MP act with some dignity and keep your antics to somewhere private. You shouldnt need to be told this.
Some debate that a person who faces accusations such as Mr Evans has should have the same anonymity as the victims until proven guilty. I would normally agree as unfounded accusations can ruin an innocent persons life. But in this case. We should know that one of our MP's acts like this. This man should not be an MP
Some people. The Liberal extreme left, the Conservatives and certain shades of the Gay community are seeing Mr Evans' victory as something to be thankful for. They are supporting this man who while he has been cleared of the charges does not refute that he is a letch.
He has a problem keeping his hands to himself and with drinking, he acted this way while being an elected member of Her Majesties government and was found out. He was unelectable until he was put somewhere safe and was kept safe by his party. He makes a lot of money as an MP and yet said that he struggled to live on £64,000 a year while he claims back his monthly telephone bill which is on the O2 "Arm & Leg" monthly contract of £300 (who the fuck are you calling and don't you have free minutes???). He agreed a law that affected innocent people who had to go to court who couldnt get legal aid and he now regrets it cos it affects him.
I dont care if you're gay, straight, bi, poly, trans, a yeti, The Gruffalo or a imaginary rabbit. If you're gonna be an MP try and have some standards. If you're gonna be an MP act with some dignity and keep your antics to somewhere private. You shouldnt need to be told this.
Some debate that a person who faces accusations such as Mr Evans has should have the same anonymity as the victims until proven guilty. I would normally agree as unfounded accusations can ruin an innocent persons life. But in this case. We should know that one of our MP's acts like this. This man should not be an MP
Some people. The Liberal extreme left, the Conservatives and certain shades of the Gay community are seeing Mr Evans' victory as something to be thankful for. They are supporting this man who while he has been cleared of the charges does not refute that he is a letch.
He has a problem keeping his hands to himself and with drinking, he acted this way while being an elected member of Her Majesties government and was found out. He was unelectable until he was put somewhere safe and was kept safe by his party. He makes a lot of money as an MP and yet said that he struggled to live on £64,000 a year while he claims back his monthly telephone bill which is on the O2 "Arm & Leg" monthly contract of £300 (who the fuck are you calling and don't you have free minutes???). He agreed a law that affected innocent people who had to go to court who couldnt get legal aid and he now regrets it cos it affects him.
Applauding this man's freedom is celebrating some very poor behavior.
What a fucking great politician.
Sunday, 29 April 2012
Music and the gentle art of making it really badly
"We want you to write some music reviews for us, your opinionated, like a lot of different types of music and know words"
Well...they're right on two counts, I'm opinionated and do know some words like "apple", "cat" and "floccinaucinihilipification"..as for different types of music...Well I only like one type 'Good' and thats relative.
So with pen in hand, a good internet speed, a huge cup of coffee and a selection of uppers and downers we can have a look at some of the new music coming our way in the forth coming month of May...
Okay first let's just get this out of the way so we can get onto some real tunes....
Chris Brown will release his new album Fortune on the 8th of May a 15 track opus thats also available as a snazzy deluxe edition that'll pump that track list up to a heady 19. A serious lack of Irony is on display on Mr Brown's part as track 3 is called "Dont Judge Me". Well Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Patricia Schnegg did after you had three domestic violence incidents. Weirdly Chris's Dad apparently works as a Corrections Officer in a prison. Anyway Chris wants us to forget about all that and move on and stop mentioning that he abused a girl with his fists. Oh and he also parks in disabled spaces.
This is the usual poor mixture of what in general rap, hip hop and soul are quickly becoming. Rubbish...generic and lacking any originality. 'I Love You' the hidden track is so run of the mill you could give it to any singer who uses "auto-tuning" as a standard vocal practise and you'd still want to stick dynamite in your ears.
This kind of nothing and vapid music will continue to plague the genre till Jay-Z releases another Blue Print album...Regardless the little girls who dont know better and the gays who should will buy it in droves...if you want to listen to hip hop might I suggest Public Enemy, N.W.A, Run D.M.C or The Beastie Boys instead. At least they have a message worth hearing and are actually quality.
Think of a number between 99 -100 add a - and thats how many out of 10 this album should get.
Ah that had a kind of catharsis to it did it not. Still onwards and upwards.
Marilyn Manson willl also be back in the spotlight with his eight studio album Born Villain. Mr Brian Warner has described his new long player as "suicide death metal" so it be should uplifting to the max and and no doubt nothing at all like the continual cheap rip off of AntiChrist Superstar he's been trotting out every couple of years or so since Mechanical Animals wasnt the album everyone wanted. He's been busy writing this album with Jeordie White aka Twiggy Rameriez and the other non Spooky Kids since 2009 and it's got the usual tradmarks of slightly off keyboards, sonic noise, thumping drums, wrenching guitars and a terrible cover - 'You're so Vain' featuring Johnny Depp (WTF?) - and silly gothy, outsider lyrics.
The title track it's self is overly long and half way through contains a section where the music drops away to some lines from Macbeth "This is a tale told by an idiot full of sound and fury." he misses the last section of the line "Signifying nothing."...which is pretty much what this is really...more of the same cod schlock rock industrial nothing. College kids who wont conform to anything other than the tight conformity's of the Goth scene will be overjoyed at this long awaited new relase from Cher's stunt double no one else will bat an eyelid.
I should mention that Hollywood mannequin Shia LaBeouf was involved in making a promotional video to coincide with the albums release...Labouf has had as much to do with the destruction of a generations childhood as George Lucas has and you would be well advised to be wary of anything he turns his talentless, Indiana Jones saga ruining, Transformers breaking, "aren't you too old to still be a child actor?" hands to.
let's say this is a 7/10 purely based on the fact Antichrist Superstar was one of the best rock albums of the late 90's and those who love him will buy it regardless.
Keane are back! And thank the good Lord, or the bad one depending on your point of view. Personally I'm an atheist and dont care either way..nor do I care about Keane not when I could be spending my time hammering nails into my scrotum. There's gonna be a deluxe edition available with a DVD...so you can watch that in bed to help you dose off and a book complete with pictures of three average looking guys who make average nonthreatening, bland 'alternative' sounding music that makes Coldplay look like Guns and Roses. There are 12 tracks...which is 12 good reasons to press stop on your CD player, the lead single 'Silenced By The Light' isnt actually that bad, if you want to listen to a band who are ripping off The Killers...really I'm bored even thinking about Keane now so let's just get to something worth while and interesting...
4 ZZZZ's and a cup of horlicks out of 10.
Thankfully May isnt actually going to be a total audio waste land and I'll be rushing down to my local independent record shop (cos I'm that cooler that much of a try hard that I wont go to HMV like the sheep or I Tunes like the ...er....other sheep) on May the 21st to purchase what'll probably be one of my musical highlights of the year The Light, The Dead Sea by The Soulsavers.
Yes indeedy Electronica's very own grunge band will be hitting the ground running with the newly conscripted Dave Gahan (Depech Mode) replacing normal singer for hire and Grunge Legend Mark Lanegan (The Screaming Trees, Q.O.T.S.A and the Twilight Singers amongst others) and for once I think it may be a smart move to replace Lanegan - never thought I'd say that - but listening to "Longest Day" and it just feels like Gahan adds a little more uplift to the music than Lanegan did with his deep smokers drawl. Fear not however the swaggers still the same, the beats are just as juicy and the subject matter still the kinda dark and bleak "Is there a God, a point to all this and can I get a light please?" lovelyness guys like me listen to with whiskey and grass at about 4 in the morning. Plus Gahan has had a heart attack on stage, attempted to commit suicide and once died for 2 mintues and then came back to life after taking speedballs while wearing Guy liner...and thats proper cool and rock and roll in my book.
The fact the Soulsavers get to work with both of these icons of alternative music and also other legendary big cheeses like Mike Patton, Jason Pierce, Richard Hawley and Gibby Haynes should tell you all you need to know about how good Rich Machin and Ian Glover are at what they do as the Soulsavers. My only request for any future Soulsavers project is that they manage to find a track big enough to get Lanegan, Patton and Gahan to work on together....Maybe a cover of Alice Mudgarden's 'Right Turn' would be just the thing eh?
I'm biased as hell toward this... 10 /10 and if you have any idea what I'm talking about give yourself a "self high five" light up a doobie and pour yourself another drink dude, you deserve it.
Other albums to keep your eyes open for are..
Garbage Not your kind of People
Joey Ramone ...Ya Know
Carrie Underwood Blown Away
Tenacious D Rize of the Fenix
Nora Jones Little Broken Heart
right that's enough nonsense for this month, see you next time for more of the same lameness and half truths. I'm off to Icon for a double tequila.
Your's with F + L
Aidy Gerrard,
Disclaimer
the comments above do not reflect the views and opinions of the publication, editors, publishers, the journalist himself or even reality, and shouldnt be read by anyone.
Wednesday, 19 January 2011
The Future of the Far Right
Some mornings on the bus into work - should I decide not to get the train - I go past a Nursery in Didsbury. Nothing remarkable about it - it's a normal late1800's Mancunian construction surrounded by a miss match of lame styles that the good people in the Construction and Development trade seem to keep putting next too each other. Anyway...the point...yes the point...Each morning I go past this building and I see a small blonde haired child holding a toy pressed up against a large bay window looking out on to Palatine Road. It's at this precise moment that I always note how early it is...7.45 am to be precise and this young chap has already been ditched by his parents and will be spending the day looking out of that window, drinking milk, sharing toys and being taught by some spotty, caked in orange make up, with no qualifications school leaver how to behave- probably blissfully unaware of how this moment in his life will continue for ever...people take you somewhere then you watch them leave.
The circle continues...and he like me will one day be trapped in amber. I wonder what will happen to this little Nazi pin up...will he grow big and strong or weak and pityful...I hope somewhere in between,...that would be best for him, and for the rest of us. Heaven hopes that during this early satge in his life being dumped with 'strangers' at 7.45 in the morning doesnt make him as weird as the rest of us.
Hmmm.......Nazi poster boy? Strong words to describe a toddler on a Wednesday morning..but what the fuck..he's never going to read this and if you're his parents I'm sorry I'm not judging you I just worry about his future sanity, the little guy looks okay at the moment with his chubby little face pressed up against that window...but one day, mark my words he'll get bored of waiting and you leaving....then you'll loose him forever. Then he'll be a crack head.
The circle continues...and he like me will one day be trapped in amber. I wonder what will happen to this little Nazi pin up...will he grow big and strong or weak and pityful...I hope somewhere in between,...that would be best for him, and for the rest of us. Heaven hopes that during this early satge in his life being dumped with 'strangers' at 7.45 in the morning doesnt make him as weird as the rest of us.
Hmmm.......Nazi poster boy? Strong words to describe a toddler on a Wednesday morning..but what the fuck..he's never going to read this and if you're his parents I'm sorry I'm not judging you I just worry about his future sanity, the little guy looks okay at the moment with his chubby little face pressed up against that window...but one day, mark my words he'll get bored of waiting and you leaving....then you'll loose him forever. Then he'll be a crack head.
Tuesday, 14 December 2010
the sun always shines...
...on Coach Trip.
I never watch that programme. I have a life and I work so I don't find the time...what I do know about it is that it's got people on it going around Europe on day trips and they get to vote on each other at the end of the programme and the losers get sent to Auschwitz. I think. That all seems a little too severe to me...I prefer them to be shot in the head. Put them out of their -no longer on holiday- misery.
A friend I recently made and I where watching 1984 on video the other day. When the men from Eastasia are being tied up and shot...I laughed. My friend asked me why I thought that scene was funny when it was so obviously not. I told him that the context was amusing, these poor bastards are being used to make the masses feverish and are no more a threat to them than a piece of paper with a drawing of a mouse on it...or something along those lines...the truth is..if you cant laugh at everything what can you laugh at?
The only other option is to cry at how cruel we are sometimes.
I choose to laugh but that doesn't mean I'm laughing on the inside.
I never watch that programme. I have a life and I work so I don't find the time...what I do know about it is that it's got people on it going around Europe on day trips and they get to vote on each other at the end of the programme and the losers get sent to Auschwitz. I think. That all seems a little too severe to me...I prefer them to be shot in the head. Put them out of their -no longer on holiday- misery.
A friend I recently made and I where watching 1984 on video the other day. When the men from Eastasia are being tied up and shot...I laughed. My friend asked me why I thought that scene was funny when it was so obviously not. I told him that the context was amusing, these poor bastards are being used to make the masses feverish and are no more a threat to them than a piece of paper with a drawing of a mouse on it...or something along those lines...the truth is..if you cant laugh at everything what can you laugh at?
The only other option is to cry at how cruel we are sometimes.
I choose to laugh but that doesn't mean I'm laughing on the inside.
Thursday, 9 December 2010
And so why not
Well it's old hat now and even my Grandmother has a blog...it consists of ways she is consistently rude to young ladies like Jodie Marsh (she called her 'Cheap' to her face) and the girl at the Hairdressers who cant do anything without having her mouth open. Ah but why the hell not...she's old and cranky and if she wants to call a woman cheap...well she worked in a munitions factory in the war...so she has the right goddammit.
But (a new paragraph starting with BUT ! And yes I sleep very comfortably in bed at night thank you) we digress...a blog...what to say??? well I'm normally always full of words...usually useless, nonsensical ones but I'll try just to write about life the universe and...er....everything and possibly we'll get some childish humor along the way. All I can promise is we wont be discussing the Human Condition in a pretentious...nay, arrogant way. As an observer of you humans and your ways, surely I'm well equipped -having spent the last thirty years trying to avoid you all - to comment on your ludicrous comings and goings. Shit I've spent enough time laughing that my life is almost sound tracked by Canned Laughter...a somewhat depressing thought.
So...I'll do my best to write often...maybe once a day - don't hold your breath - or maybe even as often as never again...but I'm making changes...I'm turning and facing the Strange and as always I find it beautiful, exciting, scary and fucking hilarious all at the same time.
Peace - I'm up out this Bitch
Your Master and Ruler
Aidy
But (a new paragraph starting with BUT ! And yes I sleep very comfortably in bed at night thank you) we digress...a blog...what to say??? well I'm normally always full of words...usually useless, nonsensical ones but I'll try just to write about life the universe and...er....everything and possibly we'll get some childish humor along the way. All I can promise is we wont be discussing the Human Condition in a pretentious...nay, arrogant way. As an observer of you humans and your ways, surely I'm well equipped -having spent the last thirty years trying to avoid you all - to comment on your ludicrous comings and goings. Shit I've spent enough time laughing that my life is almost sound tracked by Canned Laughter...a somewhat depressing thought.
So...I'll do my best to write often...maybe once a day - don't hold your breath - or maybe even as often as never again...but I'm making changes...I'm turning and facing the Strange and as always I find it beautiful, exciting, scary and fucking hilarious all at the same time.
Peace - I'm up out this Bitch
Your Master and Ruler
Aidy
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